When you need to adjust the goal posts

I knew that going back to work, staying organised at home, building my business and sticking to my blog schedule was going to be challenging. I wasn’t wrong.

I’ve been back at work for just over a week. I’ve already missed two blogs, several networking opportunities and some business-building tasks that I had planned.

Between dealing with a family crisis, the baby being sick, and the strain that often affects a marriage during times of stress, my first week back at work was a mission of survival.

Very little sleep and lots of big emotions = irrational Emma. I started thinking it was time to throw in the towel. Building a business was a great dream, but too hard at this stage in my life. I was being unrealistic thinking I could manage it all… right?

Waaaaaiiiit a second….

Here I am, coaching other people on reaching their goals, and I’m ready to quit after one horrendous week? Wake up to yaself, boofhead!

What’s that? Another curve ball! Oh goody…

Life tends to throw us curve balls just when we think we’re going okay. Sometimes I feel like my life is one curve ball after another. You too?

Staying positive throughout the shit storm, and not giving up on your dreams and goals, leads to increased resilience and success. I’m not saying you have to be positive ALL the time.

When things really suck, you’re allowed to have a meltdown. Eat a bucket of ice cream. Stay in bed and cry all day if you need to. Rant to your husband about the fact that you didn’t ask for this shit sandwich but you’re trying your best to eat it anyway and he’s a jerk for making it harder and you know you’re a failure of a wife and mother and you may as well quit your dreams and he put the god damn butter on the wrong shelf in the fridge again. Ummm…. Where was I…?

Allow yourself time to deal with your emotions

Oh yes… have a meltdown if you need to. Feel sad or hopeless for a bit. You can even allow yourself to spiral down to the pits of despair. But don’t allow yourself to stay there. Give yourself a few days to get your head around things. And then get back to your goals.

Adjusting the goal posts

It’s great to have big ambitious goals. And you need to be clear about how you’ll measure your progress. If you’re not reaching your targets it’s time to assess why, and what needs to change. But this does NOT mean you’re a failure, or that you need to just be harder on yourself.

Sometimes it might mean you have to be gentler on yourself.

Maybe you need to tell yourself how proud you are of dealing with all the other things life is throwing at you. You might need to take some time out to recharge your batteries and take care of yourself for a bit.

But don’t allow all the other things to be your excuse for giving up. Instead, accept that your goal may take a little longer. It may not follow the exact path you planned. You may need to ease up on your expectations, at least in the short term. But keep making some progress, even if it’s slow.

Can you relate?

I’m sure I’m not the only one who struggles with staying focused on my own goals when other things in life are getting hectic. Have you been there? Are you there now? Are you thinking of giving up on something you’ve dreamed about because it’s just too hard? Tell me in the comments and let’s encourage each other to keep going.

 

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5 Replies to “When you need to adjust the goal posts”

  1. Great post! You are definitely not the only one who struggles with this – I think we all do at one time or another, and I think one of the most common reasons people give up on their goals and dreams is because they don’t achieve them by their planned deadline. Love the metaphor of simply moving the goal posts. I think it was Steve Jobs who said we overestimate what we can accomplish in one year, and underestimate what we can accomplish in 10 years. Another thing I find helps is to do something, even if it is the tiniest of steps, towards that goal every day when life gets hectic – it keeps your momentum and commitment going.

    1. This is so true and doing one small thing each day keeps your goal in focus and gives you something positive to think about when other things aren’t so great. X

  2. Years ago, when I had left one secure job for another that seemed to offer more, I had no idea that the road was leading me to question why I had ever wanted that line of work in the first place. When my mom passed suddenly—nearly 2 years ago—I decided that I didn’t want to spend any more time being miserable. I started our blog. A year later, I told the job that I would not be returning. While it is scary to face an uncertain future, I am sure I made the right decision. Even on my “bad days” I remember that that my future success is rooted in my daily work of creating content, promoting it, and seeking long-term opportunities. I am finally free, but it took a tragedy to make me really reach for my dreams. Like you said, bad days may come, but as long as we remember why we are doing this, we can get back up and win the day. Thanks for sharing. I know things will settle down for you and you will be able to right your ship. ❤️

    1. ❤️❤️❤️ I am so sorry for your loss, but I have so much respect for you for taking that big leap and reaching for your dreams. Thanks for your encouragement and inspiration. Xx

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