So you’ve developed an interest in self-improvement. You’re committed to developing your skills, your emotional intelligence, and achieving your goals. GOOD FOR YOU.
But before you go too far, can I give you a tip?
The first thing you need to develop is a thick skin and some resilience.
Because as positive as your personal development is, people will try to bring you down. You will be accused of being up yourself, self-absorbed, self-obsessed, and having a “superior attitude”.
People are often threatened when they see people they know and love changing. Maybe they feel judged, or just annoyed that things are different. Maybe you don’t like to do the things you used to do with that person anymore. Or they just can’t relate to you anymore. Whatever it is, even when you don’t intend to treat people differently, they can sense that things are different and that’s uncomfortable for them.
That doesn’t meant that what you are doing is wrong. It doesn’t mean you have to go back to that train wreck of a person you used to be – even if that was the person they liked better. It might just mean that you need to find new people who do like who you have become.
I can tell you that this will also be an uncomfortable change for you. It will hurt so badly to hear these things from people you were previously close with. Try to remember that they aren’t necessarily trying to hurt you. They just don’t understand you anymore.
You can either try to help them understand where you’re coming from, or you can move on. I like to give people a chance to understand, but if they continue to insult me or bring me down, I know that it’s sadly time to move on. Because self-improvement isn’t about changing other people. It’s not your job to make them understand, or to change how they think. It’s your job to keep trying to be a better person than you were yesterday. Send them some love and keep living your life your way.
**Please make sure you are not in fact being a jerk to people.